I am now neck deep into my second attempt to sell my
Bronco on eBay. The first attempt went great! Just have
a look. Yep, it sold for more than I could have hoped, $4450. Unfortunately,
it was a fake account that was just maliciously bidding. Now, I ask you,
why in the hell would someone do that? Anyway, I offered it to the guy that
the fake bidder bid against, but never heard back from him so I relisted it.
This time, I had the brilliant idea of including my phone number in the ad so that
any freakin psycho on the internet could call me to talk about the merits of this
fine ride.
The Drunk Redneck
It is 2 flippin A.M. in the morning and I get a call from a drunk hillbilly.
“Hey, buddy, I’m callin’ ’bout that kick-butt Ford on the eBay.”
“Uh….” I am still so asleep that I cannot process this yet.
“Does the Bronco still have those kick-butt tires on it?”
“Dude, it’s 2 in the morning.”
“Did I wake yall up? I’s sorry. Well, if’n I buy it, how do I know I’ll
get it?”
“Huh?”
“Last time I bought a car off’n the eBay, I sent $26,000 to a guy for a Hummer
and he sent me a Suzuki Sidekick.”
It was at this point that I woke up enough to hang up the phone.
The Artist
I swear I am not making this up. This guy, Dah Len, calls me this afternoon
from New York City. To tell the whole story here, I will start with the punch
line. This guy is a famous New York fashion photographer, having done all sorts
of magazine covers and things involving Madonna. Google it, I swear it’s true.
OK, so I can barely understand him. He sounded French or something, but I want
you to get the whole experience.
“I am calling about your Bronco. It is a wonderful piece. I want something
brutish like this. I once saw one in a movie and I must have it. The only
thing it is missing are matt black skulls on the hood.”
I swear to God this is true. This guy is talking about buying this Bronco, driving
it home to NYC, and toodling around Grenich Village with Super
Swampers and skulls on it. I cannot even express how awesome eBay is.
This phone call alone was worth the cost of listing the car. I almost don’t
care if it sells.
After all, it is a wonderful piece.